Unedited questionnaire from Louisville Music News, February 2010

What is Your Favorite Song on Knock Alley West, and Why? 

Kirk Kiefer: “Probably ‘Slow Motion,’ since it nearly didn't make the album because we couldn't find the right arrangement. But we hit it in the 11th hour and it turned out great. The Sandpaper Dolls' contribution to this one in particular really took it to another level. From a band point of view, ‘Mississippi's Flooding’ is a lot of fun to play.”

Jacob Lee: “‘Mississippi's Flooding.’ It was great seeing that song progress from how I played it in my acoustic act to how it sounds now. It's not night and day, but it's pretty close.”

Chris Scott: “This is a tough one. Probably ‘Mississippi's Flooding’ because it's the most guitar-ey song and I am the guitar player. It's also my favorite song to play live. I wish I could give some deeper answer but it would be bullshit. I also like the energy of ‘Until I Can't Remember’ quite a bit, and think it is a perfect opener.”

Andrew Rhinehart: “I like them all but one of my favorites is ‘Slow Motion’ because I really like the lyrics, the Sandpaper dolls backing vocals, the guitar and pedal steel lines, and how it all fits together in a simplistic structure. Plus, like most people, I'm a sucker for a good ballad.”

Colin Garcia: “‘Slow Motion.’ Because of the evolutionary process it went through to become what it now is: an beautifully evocative, thoughtfully arranged ballad where every player shines.”

Ellen Cherry: “‘Until I Can't Remember’ is constantly stuck in my head, but I really love ‘Reflection’ the most. I'm a sucker for a quiet, pretty ballad.”

Melanie Dillman: “‘Bullet.’ The song just has a good groove and it's catchy.”

Elmer White: “I really enjoy ‘Until I Can’t Remember,’ I just think it’s well written and a blast to play.”

If Yardsale was a death metal band, what would it be called and why?

Kirk: “Zombie Ferris Wheel. Came up with the name in the early Yardsale days, and seems appropriate for a death metal band.”

Jacob: “Burden of Proof. 'Cause Charlie the Painter said so.”

Chris: “Bloodgasm. It's one of the longest running Yardsale inside jokes and would probably be the only name the rest of the band could agree on.”

Andrew: “I think it would be called Bloodgasm because we love inside jokes and well it pretty much explains itself.”

Colin: “We would be called Bloodgasm. Because we know a guy who has in fact experienced one.”

Ellen: “Probably Yardsale. It really sounds great in the metal Cookie Monster voice. Go on....try it.”

Melanie: “Garagesale. It is the evil Nemesis of yardsale.”

Elmer: “The Morning After Pill. No wait, BROCEPHUS. ‘YAAAAAAA (*metal yell)/Earth opens up to His demon urges/From the depths BROCEPHUS emerges/He’s come to drink life from one and all/He’s come to play Monday Night Football.’”

Which member of Yardsale do you think would be most likely to wear Spandex pants on stage? Why? 

Kirk: “I'd say a tie between Colin and Andrew – Colin because, well, let's just say he's put on spandex dive suits before; and Andrew because I think he's goofy enough to pull it off.”

Jacob: “Kirk. All the way. He'll do anything to get the ladies' attention.”

Chris: “Andrew or Colin. Probably Andrew. I mean, hell, he wears that skull shirt, which is almost just as bad.”

Andrew: “Kirk or Jacob because they are out front the most and I think spandex and cowboy boots would make an excellent fashion statement.”

Colin: “Me. Because women, statistically speaking, wear spandex the more than men. And I'm the only one comfortable enough dressing up as a woman. Yep, every word of this is fact. Humorously factual.”

Ellen: “I'm pretty sure we all have at one point. The trick is not to not wear it at the same time as someone else - that's just tacky.”

Melanie: “Kirk would be my guess. Anything for the band.”

Elmer: “Probably Colin, or Ellen, or maybe Brocephus ... or me.  'Cause.”

Which member of Yardsale would be most likely to drink Chris’s last Mexican Coke during a practice session and why? 

Kirk: “Chris himself – they are his cokes, after all.”

Jacob: “Colin pays no attention to personal boundaries, so I'd guess him. But, if Colin didn't swipe it, I'd be next in line. I do love Mexi-Cokes.”

Chris: “Andrew again, and just ’cause.”

Andrew: “Definitely me because Mexican Coke is delicious. Worst case scenario, we would have to share it.”

Colin: “Jacob. Because he doesn't pass up an opportunity to experience Mexican luxuries. That, and the large bottle probably does something for him too.”

Ellen: “All of us! We're pretty good about Sharesies is Fairsies in the band.”

Melanie: “Colin. Drummers are like that.”

Elmer: “Definitely Andrew.  If there’s anything to drink/eat at practice, it was Andrew.”

Is Yardsale stalking Barry Bernson? 

Kirk: “Isn't asking that question entrapment?”

Jacob: “Not ‘stalking.’ But, he is a person of interest.”

Chris: “No, he stalks us. The sunofabitch is outside my window every night.”

Andrew: “Not collectively; it would be too obvious. Maybe a little, virtually, in our free time. The band does make a point of visiting every one of Berson's Corners.”

Colin: “Not intentionally. But in a perfect world it would be the other way around.  Although, I did read somewhere recently that Barry Bernson is the most ‘stalkable’ TV funnyman. Second only to Merv Griffin's corpse. Wait... is he still alive?  Who cares.”

Ellen: “Stalking is a very technical ... a very LEGAL term. We prefer to think of it as just seeing what he's up to from minute to minute.”

Melanie: “Who told?”

Elmer: “Why, did he say something about us?  What was it?  Was it good?”